Friday, 16 March 2007

How to be a rebel? (Explicit contents)

Tomorrow I’ll be going to this metal concert I’ve talked about earlier. So I’ve decided to invest my time today in transforming myself into a rebel! So the great question is, how to be a rebel?

Firstly there should be a change in my language and the layout of the blog. As you’ve all noticed this blog was all clean cut with the little blue, pink and white color! Duh! This is just worth some kinda little adolescent bitch who thinks that pink and white will make her look sweet! And why the hell don’t I use words like fuck or slut or dipshit! Fuck you! If you’re fucked up by reading this then don’t do it dumbasses! This is my blog, I do what I want! I don’t want your comments or views, I’m self sufficient! Damn this is funny! Oh I love it London, I fucking love it!! Listening to machine head right now dumbasses and the volume’s really higggggggghhhh! And I don’t give a damn if I don’t hear the phone or my doorbell ringing, I’m a rebel! Take my scars and burn in hell!

So having changed my language, I’ll proceed with my look. Firstly have you ever noticed how rebels look at people? They’ve got that constipated look that makes people think they are so cool! So right now I’m working on this look. Believe me, it’s damn hard! Big fucking respect to rebels! Whoa! I’ve also got to change my way of dressing, wearing exclusively black clothes and all the metal fixtures that I can find in my house. I’ve got to give up my Nivea nail varnishes and start wearing cheap black ones! Even Maybelline won’t do dumbasses!! Coz I’m your God now!!

Next comes the attitude. Now this will really determine if you’re a rebel or not! Let’s see what makes you a rebel in Mauritius:

1) However fucking funny you find a joke, don’t ever laugh at it!

2) Pretend to be poor and unintelligent but very artistic and creative but too lazy to produce anything creative and artistic

3) Get yourself tattooed a design that every other rebels have tattooed, this will affirm more how much of a rebel you are

4) Indulge in drugs and sex and piss off everyone when you acquire an incurable disease

5) Hate every other so-called good artist, because YOUR favorite artist (Linkin Park, Eminem, Nelly, Beyonce) is the best!!

6) Pretend to know what Metallica is and say that it is one of your favorite bands! [For “rockers”]

Now this is really going to be hard! Do I really have to fucking like Linkin Park? I remember once a guy told me that he wants to form a rock band! So when I asked him which rock style most precisely? He answered like Linkin Park. And I thought “oookay!” You’ve got it. The guy was a model, so can’t blame him.

That’s it for today ladies and gentlemen, you know I don’t give a fuck about you! Duh! And fuck you little aliens!

6 comments:

  1. "I smell sex and candy here
    Who's that lounging in my chair
    Who's that casting devious stares
    In my direction
    Mama this surely is a dream"

    I am convinced now. You are a true rebel!

    Hope you'll enjoy the concert..

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  2. keli laufing her head out16 March 2007 at 18:05:00 GMT+4

    wahahahaha. morine fran tou sa c du morine!
    zordi mo ti p telma mat uni ki mone seye act as a salope all day long, du genre riye as a salope and dir ban trik ki ban salope dir...du genre mo p al donne liki parla...rooch was totally pissed off.
    kifer mone rakonte sa la...grrr

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  3. hmmmmm, the picaso tube looks cool and sexy!!:-)

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  4. xD I love the posts where you go all out like this and even go as far as adding little explanative graphics! You should have put a graph of how coolness varies with :D and yeah, autoderision rules :D

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  5. oops, meant how coolness varies with degree of rebellious attitude :D

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